Becoming Heart Sisters - Book review 2023

God created us for relationship with Him and with other people. Having successful Heart Sisters remind us that we can honor God by seeking and maintaining close relationships with other women. 

Our most recent Bible study with the women at church, was called Becoming Heart Sisters: A Bible study on Authentic Friendships (C.) 2017 by Natalie Chambers Snapp 

Published by Amplify Media  

This past year, the women in our church did a bible study called Becoming Heart Sisters. The book was all about how we can get our Christian women to be more “on board” with each other. To have the same mind with each other, understand each other better and solve conflict; live in peace with one another.

The study was designed to help us understand that God values relationships; He more than anything wants a relationship with you, but He also expects us to have relationship with each other, with other women.

Why? Women can understand one another. Women can relate to one another. And effective female relationships are good support for life.

The book is divided up into 6 chapters:

• Why Do We Need Girlfriends and Where to Find Them? 
• Getting Right with God
• Clash of the Titans
• The Forgiveness Business
• Blurred Lines
• Heart Sisters Do’s and Don’ts

Each chapter had a related memory scripture verse, such as Romans 12:18: As much as it is possible, live at peace with everyone, and Gal.1:10 Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please other people, I would not be a servant of Christ.

Throughout the book, Natalie weaves tales of conflict and reconciliation with her girlfriends, and that at one point she made the mistake of thinking as many of us do that she was better off with just her family than trying to also maintain relationship with her girlfriends, but soon realized that she also needed her girlfriends.

Because we only meet for an hour and a half, in tandem with the men’s meeting, our lessons were spread out over at least 12 weeks, with watching her video one week and discussing the lesson the other week.

It was a good pace, especially because we were talking about such hard stuff.

There were some sessions many of us stayed mute. It’s hard to talk about the hard stuff. While it feels good to talk and confide in each other, it still isn't easy to do so. A freedom comes when we do for sure.

There were things about my life I did not share. Few people in our church know about my past, and I’m certain I don’t know about many others’ pasts. I do know that one lady has shared about abuse she survived from her now deceased father and that actually helps me feel closer to her; that’s part of my story: I survived abuse at both the hands of a parent and in multiple dating relationships. It’s something that happened to us, and it doesn’t have to define us.

The only thing that defines us (and in turn, unites us) is our #1 human condition: We are all broken.

John 3:16 God so loved this (broken) world that He sent His only begotten Son that whosoever believes in Him will not perish but have everlasting life. Amen, Amen. 

Because even in Christian circles, we’re not always sure who we can trust especially if we’ve been burned before. But we also have to remember that it’s entirely possible to get burned again! It’s part of the human condition, letting each other down. Maybe we shouldn’t have expectations in the first place, but how can we not?

Expectations are set once patterns are established. We think we can rely on someone for being there in times of trouble and then one day they are not.

This happened with a friend of mine, a close friend. I met this woman throughout church, at a bible study no doubt and guess what? She was there for me for years, when I had back trouble when I had trouble with my mom and even when my dad died. But she refused to make the drive to my father's funeral. I understood this because it was 2 and a half hours away, but when my brother died, she didn’t attend his funeral, an hour away (a little closer.)  Half our church went, but she didn’t attend. And there was no card… nothing. I was surprised and disappointed but why? Because I had an expectation that she would still be there.

I've forgiven her and I've forgiven myself for being so disappointed.  

 On our last session, we were each asked to share what resonated with us most. For me, it was the P.E.G. method, suggesting we "Pray," "Examine," and "Go," whenever there is a conflict. 

What also resonated with me was the idea that Jesus always looked to the Father (our Father) for confirmation, before doing or saying something. That reminded me that we also have to pray and look to the Father before moving, to assure that whatever we are doing aligns with God's will and his plan for our life. 

That just makes us lean on and trust God even more.

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To purchase book on Amazon: Becoming Heart Sisters Participant Workbook by Snapp (amazon.com)

Sisters Photo by Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash